MAY 4, 2016

INAUGURATION REMARKS OF DONALD J. TRUMP

 FRIDAY, JANUARY 20, 2017

WASHINGTON, D.C.

TRANSCRIPT

Thank you all. Chief Justice Roberts, thank you. President Carter, the two President Bushes President Bush Senior, President Bush, President Obama, distinguished guests, my fellow Americans, thank you.

I am truly humbled to be standing here before all of you today, I really am. I want to start today by thanking President Barack Obama for his service to America. He’s done a great job, hasn’t he? A really great job.

When we began this campaign no one believed this was possible. I heard thousands and thousands of people say, from sea to shining sea, that, “Oh, Donald Trump, he can’t get elected. They won’t take him seriously, his campaign is a joke.” Yet they forgot what makes America great. They forgot what the Founding Fathers knew. America has faced challenges over and over again. And each time, America — the greatest and most powerful nation in the world — met those challenges. It’s a beautiful thing.

The mainstream media called me a demagogue, and all these other horrible things. They said, “He hates so and so” or “He wants to shred the Constitution.” Those are foolish people. One website said you’d rather have Satan than Donald Trump as president. Ivanka said the website was Weekend Collective. I said, “Weekend Collective?” I’ve never heard of these things.

America met the challenges of the Nazis. We beat the Communists. The world was a mess, a complete and total disaster. And we saved it. Now if we could do those things…[pause for emphasis]…how could we not meet these other challenges? But I worked very hard and did it.

America has a lot of challenges, we all know this. Terrorists who want to kill us. Too many jobs going to China and Mexico. Bad trade deals, the worst I’ve seen. Too many middle class families can’t make ends meet. Our debt is in crisis a disaster. Hundreds of thousands of veterans waiting for care at hospitals. We’ve got corporate patrons who run the parties. And these politicians care only about begging for money from special interests so they can get reelected. Unbelievable challenges.

But if we work together, we can make America great again, I guarantee it.

The question is how? How do we make America great again? A lot of people have wondered that throughout American history, a lot of people. And a lot of people joined my campaign because I promised a lot of things, ridiculous things. Making Mexico pay for a wall? All my people said, “That’s crazy, that’s crazy.” Well, I said, “It’ll get the votes. Republican voters will love it, believe me.”

I said, “Let’s ban all the Muslims from entering the United States until we figure things out,” and my wife asked me, she said, “You don’t even believe that. You wouldn’t actually do it.” And I said, “You have to tell the people what they want to hear.” And that’s the way it is the truth, isn’t it? That’s what politicians do to get elected. Who says Donald J. Trump is the first one to do this? Who’s the first one to do this?

And the most remarkable thing happened. I saw all my rivals trying to one-up me, The Donald Donald Trump. You can’t one-up Donald Trump. Ben Carson is saying all these things, “Oh, the Muslim shouldn’t be president.” Ted Cruz is saying, “Let’s patrol Muslim neighborhoods” and all these ridiculous things. Why did they do it? They were trying to [pause and make fist] snatch away some votes.

Look, I’m really, really rich. I have successful businesses, many successful businesses. And successful businesses make a product people want to buy. I’ve had thousands and thousands of products, but I never imagined I’d be making myself one. I’m the product so many conservatives wanted. These other products, the Cruzes and the Carsons and the Jebs — the weakest product, believe me — are knockoffs. They’re inferior products, believe me.

I’m standing at this podium today because I told Republican voters what they wanted to hear. The people who hate Muslims, I told them we’d have to monitor all the mosques and keep out the Muslims and take out terrorist families. To the people who fear blacks, I tweeted a graphic about how blacks are killing white people in droves. To the Americans who think immigrants are stealing our jobs and bringing crime, I said, “OK, we’ll build a beautiful wall to keep out the rapists.”

“And why is it taking you two days to denounce David Duke?” my advisors were asking. I said, “A lot of my supporters also like David Duke.” They called me “ultimate savior” and “glorious leader” and put “heil” before my name. Can you believe that?

Nobody gets on national television and mocks a disabled guy and does all these things without good reason, believe me. Would Donald Trump of a few years ago have done that? Nobody says an American soldier isn’t a war hero if he gets captured. And you know, you can’t just tell OPEC, “You’re not going to raise that f*cking price.” Nobody promises to pay the legal fees of people who attack other people. I’m a human being, I hate seeing people get hurt, I really do. But I had to encourage it — it’s what violent voters wanted to hear. They loved it, and hit the button by my name when it was time.

How do we make America great again? Well, Ted Cruz called me a “progressive Democrat.” I wouldn’t go that far, that’s too far. But the things I’ve said in the past I still believe. The economy does better under Democrats. Healthcare should be a right for everybody. Assault weapons should be illegal. There’s not going to be a big gorgeous wall, we’re not censoring the Internet or banning all the Muslims. These things are ridiculous. I don’t know how anyone took them seriously.

I’m like any product Americans buy, believe me. I’m like palm readers Sketchers toning shoes. Remember those? You bought these shoes you’re really excited about, think they’ll pump up your ass, but eventually you realize they’re not all that different than your other shoes. It was just made to look great through false advertising. I don’t think I’ll be all that different than past presidents, believe me.

Some people will say, “What you did was wrong.” Well, Donald Trump isn’t perfect, nobody’s perfect. You know, sometimes I say silly things about women or the blacks. But there was nothing illegal about what I did. You can sue Sketchers, like a lot of people did, and a lot of people got money from it, but you can’t sue me for being who conservatives wanted. You can’t sue a politician for flip-flopping. And at the end of the day, what’s more wrong? The millions and millions of people who wanted someone strong, someone crude, actually wanted a bigot, wanted an authoritarian…[super long pause for emphasis]…or the one guy who gave them what they wanted?

Now enough of that. Let’s get to work. Lots of smart ways to make America great again. God bless you, and God bless America.

END

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Disclaimer [added after the agent of a certain actor contacted the writer]: This article is satire, you twits. I’m not actually Paul Rudd. I’m Evil Asshole Paul Rudd, a fictional character. Keep sharing the article — or don’t, I couldn’t care less — but stop telling people it’s the real Paul Rudd. You’re gonna get my white ass sued.

Oh, hey.

It’s me, Evil Asshole Paul Rudd.

Here to explain obvious things to dipshits and dingbats. I lived in Kansas City growing up, and Jesus there are a lot of those scurrying around here. And around the world. But mostly here.

It’s why I ghosted you fuckers hard on social media. Yeah, I used to have a Twitter. Facebook, too. But they’re gone now. Tired of you blowing up my DMs. If you want to know the answers to basic ass questions like “What State is Kansas City in?” you’ll have to come here for them.

There are two Kansas Cities, OK? God, it’s sad to have to explain this. There’s a Kansas City, Missouri, and a Kansas City, Kansas, OK?

I’ll repeat it slowly so as not to confuse you: two…cities. Not one city in two states. That’s impossible, dumbass. Read the Constitution.

Now I’m going to throw a curveball your way. Most of the time, anyone who lives anywhere near Kansas City just tells people from other cities that they are from Kansas City. As an outsider, when you hear “I’m from Kansas City,” don’t assume that means Kansas. Or Missouri. Don’t assume anything, OK? I’m from Lenexa, Kansas, but when people in Los Angeles hear that, they think Slap-the-Udder is all there is to do there on a Saturday night. It’s suburbia, motherfuckers!

So yeah, sometimes it’s treated like one city in two states. Nothing wrong with that. As long as you understand it technically isn’t.

If you’re from out of town, your proper response to every statement resembling “I’m from Kansas City” is “Oh, Kansas side or Missouri side?” Whomever you’re speaking to will be blown the fuck away. Guaranteed.

All that’s left to educate you on is which is better. Now, before we start busting out the rulers for size comparisons (must…resist…shuttlecock…pun), both Kansas Cities are pretty great if we’re including the greater metro area. In other words, not just comparing Kansas City, Kansas, and Kansas City, Missouri, but including Lenexa and everywhere else. Lot of nice places to live, work, and go to school on the Greater-Kansas City-in-Kansas side, and a lot of amazing attractions on the Greater-Kansas City-in-Missouri side like downtown, the plaza, the Royals stadium, the Chiefs stadiums, and murder.

Now, all those cool things are in Kansas City, Missouri, itself, not just Greater-Kansas City-in-Missouri. So looking at just Kansas City, Kansas, and Kansas City, Missouri, Kansas City, Kansas, gets utterly destroyed. All it’s got is a cool soccer stadium and a water park that doubles as a guillotine.

If you live in Greater-Kansas City-in-Kansas you don’t want to live in Kansas City, Kansas, but if you live in Greater-Kansas City-in-Missouri it’s chill to live in Kansas City, Missouri.

Christ, this is confusing.

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The hour grows late, and Donald Trump is pants-crappingly close to clinching the Republican nomination for president, with no sign of slowing down.

Trump, widely reviled as a monster by people on the Left and the Right (minus his enthusiastic loyalists), has been called many things: racist, demagogue, sexist, liar, con man, vertical weasel roadkill display case. But worse than Lucifer himself? Now, before you make (accurate) accusations of hyperbole, hear the argument in all its satanic glory. These are the 6 reasons you’d rather have Satan as president than Donald Trump.

(Think they’re bullsh*t? At the end you can cast your vote to pick a side.)

1. SATAN HAS CONSISTENT VALUES

Say what you want about the Prince of Darkness, he’s a man of f*cking principles. Trump races from one side of the political aisle to the next like a horny polygamist bunny with 24 hours left to live. “Identifying” as a Democrat, running as Republican? Pro-choice, then pro-life? The military should commit war crimes, then it shouldn’t? Stricter gun control, then pulling a Charleston Heston and waving a rifle around on stage like a madman? (Can liberals and conservatives finally agree to keep guns out of the wrong tiny hands?)

You won’t catch Satan flip-flopping on the important issues. Didn’t accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior? You’re going to hell and you’re gonna be tortured, I guarantee it. I don’t see Satan standing at the Gates of Hell, patting you on the back, and explaining to his demons, “Look, I know this guy, he’s a great guy, and I think he’s gonna fit in great here. There’s really no reason to torment this one, he’s really a friend, he’s done a great job. I know what you’re thinking, and you know, to be honest, a lot of people have been asking me, ‘Oh, why spare this guy?’ A lot of people. You know, those are foolish people.” Lucifer just gets right to the spanking you deserve.

2. SATAN HAS LESS NAZI AND K.K.K. SUPPORT

Donald’s attacks on racial, national, and religious groups earned him support from David Duke of the Ku Klux Klan, as well as neo-Nazi types who called Trump a “glorious leader” and “ultimate savior,” adding “Heil Donald Trump” for sh*ts and giggles. While that doesn’t seem to bother Trump fans, some of us don’t like supporting the same candidates as white supremacists. A guy praised by Nazis? That should really be the first clue you’re voting for the wrong person, don’t ya think? I mean, Jesus.

Neo-Nazis and the Klan are no fans of Satan. First, he’s not white. Second, they often claim to be Christian groups. I promise you they claim it, believe me. And Christian groups — even violent, racist, extremist Christian groups — aren’t about to endorse the Great Deceiver. So I guess they would prefer Trump over Satan, but as for the rest of us? We’d go for the guy the people wearing white hoods or swastikas hate. Seems like the right thing to do.

3. SATAN HAS BETTER IMMIGRATION POLICIES

All this talk from Trump about building his “gorgeous wall” to keep out Central and South Americans and “temporarily” banning all Muslims from entering the country even has some conservatives calling foul, though a deeply unsettling number agree with him, including his “Muslim friends” who are “so happy” with his idea. For those of us who see such things as unwise, ineffective, unfair, immoral, illegal, unconstitutional, etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. etc., we need a candidate more accepting of outsiders, someone who doesn’t discriminate, someone with a sensible path to citizenship.

Enter Beelzebub. Satan doesn’t discriminate. He doesn’t care if you’re black, white, Hispanic, Muslim, Christian, atheist…he will tempt you just the same, and of course victimize you for all eternity with enthusiasm. Sure, he may not get to torture any True Believers, as they will be elsewhere, but that doesn’t mean he wouldn’t welcome them in a heartbeat if they showed up at his Gate. He wouldn’t turn people away based on race or religion or political persuasion or nation or origin. You know, he has a heart.

4. SATAN DOESN’T TAKE OUT PEOPLE’S FAMILIES

Donald Trump, already suspected of being a blithering idiot, recently bestowed this little nugget of wisdom on the American people: “The other thing with the terrorists is you have to take out their families, when you get these terrorists, you have to take out their families.” What a repetitive nincompoop. Who exactly does he think dies when we drone bomb weddings, funerals, and neighborhoods? The terrorists’ unlikable tax attorneys?

Lucifer doesn’t go there. Is your older brother a sinner? That doesn’t mean Satan will up and light you aflame while flaying your back to sinews with a bullwhip — while demons punch you repeatedly in the crotch — for all eternity. The Devil only does that to people who deserve it. You know, Muslims, Jews, atheists, agnostics, Hindus, Buddhists, Sikhs, and so on. And hey, if people deserve their punishment, no legal fees! Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha.

5. TRUMP MOCKS PEOPLE WITH DISABILITIES, BUT SATAN LOOKS OUT FOR THEIR INTERESTS

You have to be some serious kind of @$$hole to mock people with a physical handicap. But that’s exactly what The Donald did in South Carolina, mimicking the arthrogryposis of New York Times reporter Serge Kovaleski. Of course, the pompous spray-tanned gasbag later denied doing exactly what he did. Great, now he’s mocking people with Alzheimer’s.

The Prince of Darkness, on the other hand, was recently caught on surveillance video expanding access to handicap parking:

6. SATAN HAS MORE BUSINESS AND FOREIGN POLICY EXPERIENCE

Donald Trump, despite all his bragging about being “really, really rich,” and touting himself as a business wizard capable of “beating China all the time” if given the White House, has seen four businesses go bankrupt. Now, he is a successful global businessman, no doubts there, even though in the beginning things were not easy for him. He grew up in Brooklyn. His father gave him a small loan of a million dollars. And from that nothingness he pulled himself up by his bootstraps and made his fortune, even if there were some things money simply couldn’t buy.

Hell, of course, has never gone bankrupt. Satan has been running it successfully for thousands of years, and not a single demon lost his job. Satan also has extensive foreign policy experience, particularly in the Middle East, but elsewhere as well. It’s a big job, tempting billions of people. The Donald may drone on and on about the “good deals” and “great deals” he makes, but zero of them come close to rivaling a “Deal With the Devil.” Satan is such an effective dealmaker, he convinces people to sell him their souls. Their souls. Now that’s a man who can make good deals.

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In this morning’s Today Show interview, her first since endorsing Donald Trump for president, Sarah Palin reminded us all what a strained relationship with reality looks like.

First and most important was Palin’s insistence to hosts Matt Lauer and Savannah Guthrie that she didn’t say in her endorsement speech of Trump that President Barack Obama’s alleged disrespect for U.S. soldiers contributes in some manner to the Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder many soldiers experience, including her son.

“You said that President Obama may be to blame for some of the PTSD that’s out there,” Guthrie said.

“I never said that,” Palin interrupted, with a puzzled look.

“I never blamed President Obama,” she continued, explaining that she was simply criticizing Obama for his “level of disrespect for the United State military” as revealed by his military budget: “not trying to beef it up and let our military do the job that they are trained to do… Let’s get in there and utterly destroy ISIS” instead of deciding to “kowtow” and “allow the enemy to be poking at us.”

Palin seems to think the decline in military spending since 2010, from nearly $700 billion to about $600 billion in 2015, signals Obama’s disrespect for the military. Yes, there couldn’t possibly be more straightforward explanations, such as the end of the U.S. occupation of Iraq.

Her insistence that she didn’t claim Obama’s disrespect contributed to the damaged mental state of veterans is up for debate. Her words from her endorsement speech, original grammar and made-up words preserved, are as follows:

Our wounded warriors, sometimes in body and in mind, coming back different than when they left for the war zone. I can talk personally about this, I guess it’s kind of the elephant in the room, because my own family—going through what we’re going through today with my son, a combat vet having served in a striker brigade fighting for you all, America, in the war zone. But my son, like so many others—they come back a bit different. They come back hardened. They come back wondering if there is that respect for what it is that their fellow soldiers and airmen and every other member of the military so sacrificially have given to this country. And that starts from the top. It’s a shame that our military personnel even have to wonder, if they have to question if they are respected anymore.

That comes from our own president. Where they have to look at him and wonder, “Do you know what we go through? Do you know what we’re trying to do to secure America?”

So when my own son is going through what he goes through coming back, I can certainly relate with other families who kind of feel these ramifications of some PTSD and some of the woundedness that our soldiers do return with.

And it makes me realize, more than ever, it is now or never, for the sake of America’s finest, that we have that commander-in-chief who will respect them and honor them.

Obviously, it’s heavily implied that Obama is partially worsening the “woundedness” of soldiers. Palin may not have said it clearly–most of what she says is characterized by a lack of clarity–but she came very close.

Second, one can’t help but notice that despite Palin’s valiant stand for soldiers with PTSD, she advocates more of the very thing that causes it. ISIS must be “utterly destroyed.” No more “kowtowing.” The U.S. must unleash the dogs of war, continuing policies that leave U.S. soldiers–and far more foreigners–killed, maimed, traumatized, suicidal. Does Palin not understand the War on Terror is the direct cause of people coming back “different,” “hardened”?

As Weekend Collective noted, by 2015 half a million troops had a brain injury or PTSD, with 7,000 dead. Over 1 million innocent people in the Middle East died due to U.S. wars since 2001. Yet Palin pushes for more.

Thirdly, and bizarrely, Palin seemed miffed the topic even arose, and in her discomfort openly lied, and took a shot at the hostile liberal media in the process:

You guys brought me here to talk about Iowa politics and the caucus tonight, not to talk about my kids. And that was a promise. But, as things go in the world of media, you guys don’t always keep your promises evidently.

Yes, I’m sure NBC was so desperate to get an interview with Palin they promised to steer clear of the controversy.

Lauer had the deadpan look of a man about crush someone with cold hard facts when he said, “There were no specific promises made about content of the interview, only that this would be your first interview since you endorsed Donald Trump.”

Finally, in perhaps the closest Palin will ever come to acknowledging Donald Trump is a monster, the woman actually told Christian voters not to worry about his faith, a sharp difference from standard conservative strategy.

Guthrie said Palin’s appeal to evangelical Christian voters made her endorsement valuable to Trump, and asked if Trump was the “godly candidate” they sought.

Palin responded that she hoped voters weren’t looking for the “Christian-y, godliest candidate”! “People are looking for he who has that record of success that proves he’s going to be able to get the job done for us finally.”

When Sarah Palin tells religious people to worry about a candidate’s record and not his godliness, that’s probably a good sign religious voters should find someone new to support.

Watch the full interview here.

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The first contest of the 2016 presidential race for Democrats, the Iowa caucus, is this Monday, February 1. A Quinnipiac University poll released today shows Bernie Sanders leading Hillary Clinton, the candidate once called “inevitable,” by four points in Iowa. As one final pitch for the best candidate, here are 16 reasons why all Iowans should vote for Sanders.

1. SANDERS IS SCANDAL-FREE

Polls from the end of 2015 show a colossal 60% of Americans do not think Hillary Clinton is honest and trustworthy; 36% think she is. With Bernie Sanders, it’s the opposite. 55% think Sanders is honest and trustworthy, 24% think he is not. This is due to, as Weekend Collective noted, the constant scandals and lies Clinton was and is involved in. Sanders’ long career in politics has been refreshingly devoid of scandal.

2. HE HAS MORE EXPERIENCE

Seriously. Clinton has only spent 8 years in an elected position, as senator for New York. She spent 4 years as Secretary of State and 8 years as first lady, both unelected positions. Contrast these 20 years of elected and unelected positions to Sanders’ 32 years of elected office. He spent 8 years as a mayor, 16 years in the House, and 8 years (and counting) in the Senate.

3. HE’S THE MOST POPULAR SENATOR IN THE NATION

Last year he had an 83% approval rating in Vermont, higher than any other U.S. senator in their respective states.

4. SANDERS REFUSES CORPORATE CASH

Clinton’s top donors are big banks and corporations like Citigroup, J.P. Morgan, Goldman Sachs, and Time Warner. Sander’s top contributors are unions like the National Education Association, United Auto Workers, and the Laborers Union. Sanders declared he doesn’t want money from corporations or the wealthy, and refuses to use a Super-PAC.

5. HE SHATTERS RECORDS

Sanders reached 2.5 million campaign donations faster than any presidential candidate in U.S. history, including Barack Obama. He has also drawn far larger crowds than Clinton (her campaign claims Clinton prefers small crowds), such as 26,000 people in Boston, 28,000 in Portland, 27,500 in Las Vegas. Nearly 400,000 have flocked to see him since his campaign began.

6. UNLESS YOU MAKE $250,000 A YEAR, YOUR TAXES WON’T RISE MUCH

If you make between $28,800 and $250,000, your taxes will go up about 2%. Those making more will see their taxes raised 5-7%. This, as well as tweaks to capital gains and dividend taxes, will increase government revenues by nearly 50%, helping fund Sanders’ bold new social programs.

7. SANDERS CALLS FOR FREE HEALTHCARE AND COLLEGE FOR ALL, AND A JOBS PROGRAM FOR THE UNEMPLOYED

Through his tax plan described above and by ending corporate tax breaks and closing tax loopholes that allow the wealthy and corporations to hide much of their money in tax havens outside the U.S., Sanders proposes creating a jobs program in which the unemployed would work to rebuild America’s crumbling infrastructure and making public colleges and medical care free for all citizens.

His website lays out how each proposal will be paid for (and how some proposals will generate revenue greater than their cost). With healthcare, for example, what a typical family pays currently for private insurance is far greater than said family’s increase in taxes to cover universal healthcare. There will no longer be a need for the insurance giants Clinton supports.

8. HE SUPPORTED GAY RIGHTS LONG BEFORE CLINTON

While Clinton supported anti-gay legislation in the 1990s and didn’t voice support for gay marriage until 2013, Sanders called for the legalization of gay marriage in 2009, opposed the discriminatory legislation that Clinton supported, and has shown in his words and actions to stand for human rights since 1972, when he called for an end to laws banning homosexual behavior in Vermont.

9. HIS “SOCIALISM” IS NOTHING TO BE SCARED OF

Sanders calls himself a democratic socialist, but his policies are that of a social democrat. Basically, his “socialism” is just an expansion of popular Democratic programs–expanding Medicare to cover all citizens, expanding Social Security, changing Pell grants and student loans into free college, more closely regulating Wall Street and giant corporations, etc. See Weekend Collective’s “Bernie Sanders Barely Scratches the Surface of What Socialism Is.”

Also, think about it: calling yourself a socialist is not likely to make a presidential bid easier. It speaks to Sanders’ willingness to stand for what he believes, to be honest and open.

10. MOST AMERICANS AGREE WITH HIM

Sure, don’t do something just because everyone else is doing it. But, as the Washington Post reported, a majority of Americans agree with his stances on key issues. This country may be more “socialist” than you thought.

11. SANDERS MARCHED WITH DR. KING

It’s true. Not only did Bernie Sanders join in the famous 1963 March on Washington, he was involved with the Congress for Racial Equality (CORE) and the Student Nonviolent Coordinating Committee (SNCC) at the University of Chicago, protesting police brutality and organizing sit-ins for racial equality. He was arrested in 1962 for protesting segregation.

12. HE WANTS A $15 HOURLY MINIMUM WAGE; CLINTON THINKS THAT’S TOO GENEROUS

Sanders has been calling for higher wages for working people for a long time, and believes the minimum wage must be raised to $15 an hour. Clinton, caught between a liberal base that demands an end to the widespread poverty in the U.S. and her corporate backers, settled on a $12 hourly minimum wage. This despite the ample evidence that higher minimum wages actually leads to job growth and raises prices only an insignificant degree.

13. SANDERS WAS, UNTIL RECENTLY, IGNORED BY THE MAJOR MEDIA, BUT OVERTOOK CLINTON ANYWAY

For example, after the first Democratic debate in October, media outlets like CNN declared Clinton the winner (CNN is owned by Time Warner, which donates to Clinton’s campaigns), but many polls and focus groups showed viewers thought Sanders the victor, from Fox News to Slate, to Fusion, Time, The Drudge Report, Daily Kos, and CNN itself! Despite being dismissed, Sanders is now leading by a hair in Iowa, crushing Clinton in New Hampshire, and gaining ground in other states and nationally.

14. SANDERS JOINS ORDINARY PEOPLE IN PROTESTS

Sanders, an activist since his days in college, still finds time to join causes he believes in. He joined the NAACP Journey for Justice march in D.C. in September, Verizon workers on a picket line in New York in October, fast food workers striking for a higher wage in D.C. in November.

15. HE FLIES COACH

Sanders is not a poor man. It is estimated Sanders is worth $330,000, Clinton $15 million (not counting Bill Clinton’s even greater wealth). Still, Sanders is a humble, down-to-earth man. People often take pics of him as he flies coach around the country.

16. HIS UNOFFICIAL CAMPAIGN SLOGAN IS LIKELY THE GREATEST IN AMERICAN HISTORY

“Feel the Bern,” created by Sanders fanatics, represents the mass excitement over his political revolution. Sanders supporters are so passionate, and as Sanders is a person of deep integrity and vision, who wouldn’t want to join?

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